Mixed Reviews

Hello again to our loyal blog followers. First off, let me apologize for not posting sooner. There is a lot to explain and instead of writing a blog following our Wednesday appointment and scans, I figured I would wait until we had all the information at hand. And at long last - we do.

So as some of you know, B had an appointment on Wednesday with Dr. # 4 for a standard follow up and for what we thought was a normal chemo appointment. We actually thought that we were going to meet with Dr. # 4, start chemo, get a scan, get scan results, meet with Dr. # 4 again. However, this plan/schedule was way off. So B and I started off Wednesday by meeting with Dr. # 4. B explained to Dr. # 4 that he again is having terrible terrible pain in his chest, in his back, and in his right and left hip. B and I also explained that we met with the Dr. # 11 some time last week and that he wanted to get a CAT scan done so he could take a better look at what is going on in the pelvis and hip. Dr. # 4 agreed that it was again time to get a CAT scan done and he finished the appointment and sent us into the chemo area where we met with Tammy, the oncology RN, and waited for the itinerary for the day. Tammy was gone for a pretty long time and finally looped back to inform us that Chemo was again canceled for the day. Not due to any low blood counts, but due to the fact that Dr. # 4 wanted to see what the scan had to show before doing chemo again. So in an instant the day was turned upside down - another wasted 2+ hour car ride for DBone!! B was scheduled for a scan that afternoon and they were going to do a wet read....meaning we would find out the same day the results of the test. Holy shit, excuse my language, but holy shit was that ever nerve-racking. Please tell me how one is supposed to focus on work knowing that you are going to find out the results of a cancer scan that afternoon? Needless to say, I went back to work with nothing but prayers being recited mentally all day long.

B had his scan at 2 pm at the cancer center and then he and DBone headed home to wait for the call. 'The call' was scheduled to come around 5, so I was planning to take off around 4:30 to get home in time to hear the news with B and DBone. However, the call come in around 4:15 and I didn't make it home in time to hear the news with B. So instead I got a call at work where B informed me that the cancer had spread. Talk about a gut wrenching feeling. I mean it when I say this is the closest I have come to passing out in my life. I was seeing stars and had to sit down in the back office. I put my head on the desk, cried, got myself together, grabbed the lunch I didn't eat, and headed home. I think I drove 100 on 131 S, and I didn't care if I got pulled over or not...my only focus was getting home. B was surprisingly calm. He said he knew all along with all the pain he was having that there had to be cancerous spots there. And he was right!!!! I can almost guarantee if B is complaining of horrendous pain that cancer is lurking in the cracks, or is hanging out just around the corner. It is just frustrating because B had been complaining of pain in his chest for 2 months (although he did really think it was related to the puke thing), but they kept down-playing his symptoms, too, thinking that the pain was just from the vomiting experience., as well. Both DBone and I wanted to punch someone for not listening. But in the Dr.'s defense, the spots are really small. Looking back at the scans that they did in July, the Dr.'s and Radiologists are coming to recognize that B had cancer in his sternum all along. So to everyone out there who thought that B and I were crazy about the pain he was describing, we were NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!. He was so right, so right all along. And the pain is paralyzing, and B is again getting stuck on the couch or in the bed because he no longer has the strength to lift himself because of the extreme pain he has in the sternum....not cool.....not cool at all. Dude's like a doormat when he gets flat...although he can balance a mean jar of salsa on his belly ;) That's my B!

The scans also showed 2 new spots on his back-one on his upper right side on a rib and one on his left hip. And believe it or not, B has been complaining of pain in the lower left back and hip, and I am all sure that you are shocked to hear that he has spots there too....right? I guess you could say that B knows his own body better than anyone else. Dr. # 4, however said that the spread of the cancer is very very slow and that the lung lesion is the exact same size, that the neck, which was previously treated with radiation, is better, and that the right hip is better too. So Dr. # 4 described the cancer as having mild progression. However, since the cancer is still spreading they are going to have to change B's chemo again. Dr. # 4 said that up until this point he was treating B with a chemo that was targeted for colon cancer and he is thinking of changing course to more of an upper GI cancer. We are also considering another second opinion - just to get some fresh eyes. It is not that we don't trust Dr. # 4, because he is good at what he does, it is just that a fresh set of eyes in the mix might help in finding a missing clue, or not, or coming up with a new idea, or not. But it can't hurt the situation - that is for sure. So I guess you could say this week has been pretty hard to swallow. I have cried a fair share, as has B. It's just hard to understand how all of this could happen.

So in terms of treatment....B is again going to undergo radiation to kill those new spots and to treat the pain. Dr. # 4 as well as Auntie R and her Oncology Dr. Friend, agree that the most important thing to do at this point is to treat the pain. And by
radiating these troublesome spots, it is the hope that the pain will subside and those little spots will die and go away. And Dr. # 4 said it would be really dangerous to do chemo and radiation at the same time, so B is getting a 2-3 week break (really like 4-5 since he didn't have it last or this week) from Chemo. I guess both radiation and chemo at the same time could cause a dangerous drop in blood counts and with the cold season approaching Dr. # 4 wants to side on the error of caution. B is gladly embracing this break. The chemo is really starting to take a toll on his body, so a break is just what he needs. Of course we are going to again re-visit chemo in the next few weeks, and by that time Dr. # 4 will have a great and more directed game plan in mind. For now B is scheduled to meet with the Radiation Oncology Team again this Monday and we're confident we'll have more direction and a more outlined plan of attack. Game on! And might I add that B is looking forward to earning another certificate for graduating from radiation boot camp.

As for now we just request prayers for both B and I as well as our families who are also struggling with the latest news. This is obviously a set back (small, and we actually left yesterday's appointment happy with the discussions and outlooks) but B is strong and it is what it is at this point. Every day together is a blessing and I am thankful to be able to help B beat the crap out of this cancer. Thanks again for stopping by, and as we get more info we'll work hard to get the info out there. Go State and enjoy the first fall weekend!!