Celebrate Good Times...As Best You Can

This past weekend B and I attended our first wedding of the year, and the first wedding since our wedding last August. It was truly a wonderful day. B and I got to meet the parents of our dear friend Mrs. Lips, and we got to share in the wedding of Team J. The weather was beautiful, the bride was beautiful, and the band was rocking, and I had B there by my side.

I have come to realize that drinking makes me very very emotional, so as a precaution and to prevent a scene, I decided to lay off the booze. I had nightmares that I might get out of control....it's happened in the past so I played it safe and stuck to H20. I have to be honest, there were times when it was hard. Usually B is the life of the party, showing off his moves on the dance floor, and busting out a chair dance that you swear was choreographed by Paula herself, but this wedding was different....B was sidelined and it was hard. However that being said we made the best of it, and celebrated good times with some of our closest friends. Hell, we went to the wedding and had a good time, and B even busted out a dance or two with his cane! And don't worry I was there by his side to block any drunk bastards from knocking him over.

And so we stayed the night in St.Joe and headed back to GR on Sunday for some family time. It was nice seeing the Homrich Clan and we got to wish Big D and the rest of the family a face to face happy father's day. And so the weekend ended on a high note bringing us into what has now been dubbed HELL WEEK.

This week started with chemo on Tuesday. B and I woke up early on Tuesday because we had to get to the cancer center for B to get his port put in. This was a procedure that we thought took 15 minutes....think again!!!!!!! B was in the outpatient surgery center for about 3 hours....the staff forgot to mention that the prep for the procedure takes an hour, the procedure itself takes an hour, and the recovery takes an hour. So I was running back and forth all morning long checking on him and making sure that everything was OK. Neither D Bone or I knew that the procedure was going to be this involved so our morning was chaos, and B got a late start on his chemo. All and all B was at the cancer center for over 10 hours on Tuesday....are you frickin kidding me?!? And don't forget his daily radiation treatment. I just don't know how much more my husband can take. It makes me sick. We did meet with Dr. # 4 again.....we meet with him every 2 weeks. Dr. # 4 is hopeful that his new chemo begins to work in killing the cancer. If this happens we will stay the course with this treatment. We will have a better read on this following a scan, which will be scheduled in 2 months or so. Dr. # 4 seemed pleased so far with the new chemo and tends to think that B is feeling a better...other than the right leg. B is scheduled for an MRI of his spine tomorrow and we hope that Dr. # 11 can be our real life "HOUSE" and get to the bottom of this leg pain.

B had radiation again on Wednesday and then had to be back to the cancer center again today to have his portable chemo pack removed. He is so tired and that is understandable. I am tired thinking about it, and I honestly have no idea how we keep the appointments straight. Wednesday, however marked B's last radiation treatment, and thank goodness for that. B's throat is so burned that he is having a hard time eating or drinking anything. He has to force himself to eat, and it such a struggle that he is passing on meals all together. This was to be expected and it is our hope that the radiation works this time around.

The end of the week is winding down and so are B's appointments. And we have a very quiet weekend on tap, which we need. Please keep us in your prayers....we need them. More updates to follow.

Take Me Out to the Ball Game

It has been a while since I last visited the blog. I guess you could say that both B and I needed a break. A break from life.....big exhale, and the blog kinda got put into the Cancer group and was black listed. Today, however, I'm feeling a bit better and decided it was time to write. So where did I last leave off.....oh yes, our last appointment with Dr. # 4. Well, to be honest not much has happened. B completed his first round of the new chemo, and we both came to terms in our own time our new destiny. It took some time but we got there, and I didn't even need a glass of wine, can you believe that?!? By Friday B was coming around so we packed up Bear, Larry, and D-Bone and sent them on their way back to the Dirty D. That was because B and I had a date with the Lips to go to a Tigers game, and we'll be damned if we didn't make it to that. I guess you could say that it was our goal to get there, and nothing, not ever cancer or Chemo was going to stop us.

So away we went in the new Subaru, and in good time. I drive with meaning, and even Juancho commented on my fast driving. I don't do anything slow, and anyone who really knows me can attest to that. We checked into the Double Tree, got our hot, freshly baked chocolate chips cookies, hit up Greek Town for dinner, and headed to the game. It was a great time, and for the first time in a long time I saw B smile, really smile. We were joking around like the good old days, and for about 4 hours or so I we were able to put Cancer on the back burner. The whole day was great...from the awesome tickets, to the great sign Juancho made, to singing take me out to the ball game, to the badass fireworks, to the walk off home run, to seeing Em Dawg, and finally to the free post game dinner and drinks..courtesy of the worst bar tender in history. It truly was a break that we both needed.....thanks Mom and Dad Barton.

But as the old adage goes, All good things must come to an end, and they did. We woke up Sunday morning, and we both knew it was going to be a rough day, but neither of us expected it to be that bad. We couldn't get home fast enough, and things got worse as the day went on. Not to mention B had a 2 hour MRI late Sunday night, and that did not help the cause!!! Sunday night was horrible, and I was on the phone early Monday with B's RN. Not only was B in terrible pain, he had a strange rash on his arm and a terrible infection in his big toe. And so back to the cancer center we went. The RN took one look at B and his arm and immediately went to get Dr. # 4. Dr. # 4 suspected a possible infection (cellulitis) and put him on an antibiotic. And as luck would have it, B had a reaction to the antibiotics and was puking all day Tuesday....no I'm not kidding. B also had a second 2 hour MRI on Tuesday for our appointment today with Dr. # 11.

Since B continues to have terrible knee and lower leg pain, Dr. # 4 thought it would be best to take a look at the entire leg to completley rule out any cancer. Dr. # 4 said it would be extremely rare to have cancer in the lower leg, however nothing about B's condition has been straight forward, so B had some new scans, and was referred to Dr. # 11. The good news is that B doesn't have cancer in the lower leg, however B is going to have another MRI....yippee. This will be a MRI of the spine, and will allow Dr. # 11 to rule out the lesion on L2 as the possible cause for the lower limb pain. Dr. # 11 is determined to get to the bottom of this pain, and plans to see it though to the end. Dr. # 11 says that B is doing great, all things considered, and I tend to agree. So all in all good news for now.

We have another long weekend planned...a wedding, and a family celebration with the Homrich Clan to for my mom's b-day, my parents 30th anniversary, and of course father's day. Let's just hope this Sunday is not as rough as last.

Change of Plans

Today was our standard scheduled follow up appointment with Dr. # 4 prior to our least favorite activity to date...CHEMO. B and I had some pretty important questions that we have been waiting for answers for, and in our mind it was D Day. To start the Dr. asked how B was doing, and for the first time he actually told the Dr. "not good". Usually B tries to be so strong, and he is strong, but as I said in the last blog, B is not feeling good at all and he came clean.

There were several issues to address so lets began at the top of the list
A. The Lower Leg
The lower leg is a real problem, and we are back to sleepless nights and B being unable to get comfortable. It seems that Katie Perry has again entered the equation hot, cold, yes, no, and I am so over that song....time to move to a new track. So to address the issue Dr # 4 has ordered a MRI of B's entire right leg. Dr. # 4 said it would be exceptionally rare for B to have cancer in his lower leg, however the only way to rule this out is to do n MRI. Dr. # 4 actually suspects that the leg pain is related to the hip surgery, but time will tell. We also have an appointment scheduled with a new Orthopedic doc, who will review the images and we hope will get to the bottom of this issue.

B. The Genetic Test/ Where we are at with Treatment
We found out today that Dr. # 4 is changing B's chemo regimen. As it stands, actually as it always stood, Dr. # 4 felt that things were not adding up and he was never fully convinced that the lung was the source tumor. So we got the genetic test results back, and the test are pointing us in a new direction.....gastro intestinal, however we are cautious of putting this in writing because the genetic test % was so low. With the tumors being the same size, the genetic test results, and the look of the lung tumor, Dr. # 4 is cautious to classify B with stage 4 lung cancer, and said that we need to make a change. He did say that since B is not responding to the current chemo that he is a bit concerned, however that B looks pretty good. Whatever cancer B has, it is still stage 4 since it has spread to several different locations. B started this new chemo regimen today and it was really a kick in the gut and here is why.....B is now having chemo every 2 weeks for the next 6 months starting today. The only way things will change is that after his next 3 month scan the Dr. does not see some sign that the chemo is working......in which case we will change course again. B has to get a chemo port put in, and after every treatment he is hooked up to something that looks like a fanny pack. This is a medicine that has to run it's course 48 hours following chemo. Since B didn't have a port today they had to jam this thing into his arm and it was terrible. After the port is in, things will be much easier and pain free. I guess you could say that we both felt a bit shocked. The best I can describe is imagine running a marathon and getting to mile 22 and then having someone say to you that the marathon is in fact 44 miles long and you were only halfway there. And to think, you only trained for the 22 miles and you are left to wonder how you are ever going to finish that frickin race!!! It just seems like the road keeps getting longer and longer, and I know we are both wondering why!?! B has so many appointments and tests we may as well get a room at the cancer center...it is ridiculous!!!!!!! Not to mention he started radiation this week and it runs for the next 3 weeks, right with the Chemo. This just sucks plain and simple.

C. The Neck
B is still having terrible neck pain. He moves his head from side to side like he has terrible whip lash. Drivers beware!!!! It takes B so long to look in his blind spot due to these stupid neck lesions, I would tell you all to change lanes if you see him on the road in our new Forester. It is our hope that the radiation helps this issue but we are not sure....too early to tell. However there is a chance that B is going to get some pretty good burns and blisters on his neck.....awesome right? I just don't know how he does it, but both our hearts are broken right now.

I really wish I had better news to report but I am just being raw with all of you. No sense in painting a pretty image when the truth is B and my plate are more than full right now.